Ya know, it’s got y’all talkin... and thinkin... about people who are “different”. For that, I’m forever thankful! Dahlia is creating an awareness about a birth defect that before was never really talked about. I didn't know what it was. I had heard of it, some jibber jabber about folic acid, and I knew they tested for it. I had no idea there were different types, that no two were the same, that it created nerve damage throughout your body... how many organs were affected... that this would be us and our new normal.
So I've thought so much lately about normal. It hit me here.. Me: "Why do I clean? I swear I mopped... I cleaned for hours! Now it's trashed, it kills me." Adam:" Yeah babe, it kinda sucks. But we have three children and it's just life right now. This is our new normal."
Our new normal.
Thinking about that makes so much sense to me now. It answers so many questions that have stirred in my brain. "Why are they crying when they see me?" "They look so sad when they look at the baby. What's that about... it's a new baby!" "What are the "sorry" about?" "We're ok! I don't understand the pity!" Why? Because this is NORMAL for us now. It's just our life, the cards we were dealt, and we're rockin' it.
Today we went to Vanderbilt to visit with the Neurosurgeon who wanted to re-check Dahlia's wound. As we waited, we were surrounded by so many children with disabilities... severe SEVERE disabilities. **Keep in mind: Vanderbilt Pediatric Neurosurgery**. Wheelchairs, tremors, loud screaming, not able to speak, loss of body control... and parents who smiled and held their babies, they wiped drool from a grown boy's mouth, held their 8 year old who couldn't move, they opened snacks, read books, and handed off their phones for a youtube show. It's normal for them. That is life. The cards THEY were dealt, they're rockin' it. And you know... they don't understand why people cry when they see them, why they stare, the pity... because that's normal for them and they don't see it as a sad. It's their baby and they are the mama's and daddy's who birthed them and love them. They don't see the imperfections.
The pity look has been tough for me.
What is helpful? A hug telling us we're rockin' it. A smile telling us our baby is amazing! Encouragement. Support. It would be so easy to let your mind drift to the negative and it's so nice to be reminded of gratitude and all the AMAZING you've been given.
Just food for thought as you embark on your next public journey where you may see someone who is "different" or as your teaching your children about love and kindness. We could all use a little pat on the back every once in a while. After all, we're all just doing the absolute best we can do. <3
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